ScottMom - the feelings your family is throwing your way has nothing to do with you or your new home, and everything to do with their memories and letting go of the past.

I lost my own dear father-in-law last summer and I still think of him every day. The impact on the family is intense. Letting him go bit by bit has been what this whole past year was about. Our upcoming family vacation is the first one without him in nearly 40 years. It's necessary but will be difficult too. I expect tears, laughter, stories, and giving our children a glimpse of the grandpa they loved so much.

Try not to see this experience as negative or somehow cheating you. Instead, see it as the tremendous gift it is. You're the custodian of your family's history, challenged with the task of preserving it's past and creating it's future.

Make this new home your own. Treasure all of the memories. Welcome the comments from family members. Give them a chance to talk about their memories and how they tie into this house. Then set about making new ones for future generations to discuss!

[ 07-09-2006, 02:47 PM: Message edited by: CrewChief ]

Ive suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened. Mark Twain

Events don’t cause stress. Interpretation of events cause stress. Seyle

We had my son's birthday party tonight at the new house-because it has a huge yard. Everyone that came just wanted to see how far we've come on the new house, and it seems, complain about all the changes we've made to a house that's been in the family almost 50 years. It's funny because all we've done so far, is all the things my father in law wanted to do for his mother but his father wouldn't let him do. So I think of it as my final gift to someone I really cared for. The thing that really gets me is when people ask "Why did you change that, take that out, or why didn't you like ...?"
We've been working every spare moment for more than 2 months just making the place liveable and we have at least 2 more weeks of stuff to do. I feel like we have been cheated out of our summer because we don't have time or energy or extra money to do fun things. I really love summer vacations, so it sucks.
Lately I like that "Bad Day" song.
"Cause you had a bad day, You're taking one down, You sing a sad song just to turn it around, You say you don't know, You tell me don't lie, You work at a smile and you go for a ride, You had a bad day, The camera don't lie, You're coming back down and you really don't mind, You had a bad day, You had a bad day"
Course, when you feel like it's everyday, it's not so uplifting.
If I have anything to pass onto my children, it's what I've learned working on this house. Use common sense and do it right the first time-not cheapest or easiest-right, so future generations aren't paying for it forever and feel that all you've left them is your mess.
Ok, that post makes up for me being stressed all day! [img]smile.gif[/img]

d- My husband is being transferred. He works for Caterpillar. This is our fourth move with them so it's kinda routine now. I guess that's why I'm not too stressed out.

I've lived in so many places and have found something to love about each place - even Flint, MI. (My apologies - in more ways than one - to anyone here who lives in Flint...)

CC-never asked but why are you moving..work, schools, different community stuff...maybe you'll already said...
d

See, Shawn, I knew you'd get it!!! My husband said that the first time he heard "Don't Ask Me How I Know" on the radio he was so overcome with emotion that he had to pull over and wait for it to be over. His dad was terribly sick at the time and he was feeling very nostalgic. That song reminds me of my brother. I guess it's something about being a kid in the 60s/70s!

My son feels ripped off this summer. His old school got out late, first week of June and his new school starts back August 10 so it's a short summer. Luckily, we have a whole extended-family vacation in Minnesota (BWCAW/Quetico) the last week of July. The movers unload our stuff on the 18th & 19th and then we hop on a plane for Duluth, MN on the 21st. At least we're ending summer break with a bang!