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Bullying

16 years 9 months ago #140512 by heidi614
Replied by heidi614 on topic RE: Bullying
Steps to respect program is good. Our PTO ordered it.
18 years 6 months ago #54974 by kmamom
Replied by kmamom on topic RE: Bullying
In my last post here I mentioned the Princpal/Teacher aspect of bullying. When kids see teachers and administration get away with bullying it sends a powerful message to the kids and parents. FINALLY, after YEARS of bullying kids (he never actually hit anyone, but I think the kids would rather he did!), someone reported one of our gym teachers in writing.

At first the administration played the, "You'll-never-win-you're-overreacting hand," but the parent stuck to their guns and it looks like the teacher will be let go (nothing definitive yet--the administration/BOE has to follow privacy laws). It wasn't easy for them or their child (who came to his parents)--stress doesn't even begin to cover it, especially when the teacher accused is allowed to stay in the classroom.

Every now and then your faith in man gets restored.
18 years 6 months ago #54973 by <speakup>
Replied by <speakup> on topic RE: Bullying
kmamom - 'Sometimes i worry though that he's seeing the message, "Why bother when you'll lose any way?" but I try not to think about that '

its all about apathy and what happens when people DONT speak up for themselves or for what is right thing to do.

"All it needs for evil to prosper is for people of goodwill to do nothing" (Edmund Burke)
18 years 6 months ago #54972 by <speakup>
Replied by <speakup> on topic RE: Bullying
LGH - 'If you are the type of person to complain about everything' - some people think asking a question is a COMPLAINT. thats where communication steps in. adults who cannot sit at the table and talk over things, asks questions, discuss, (isnt that what pto meetings are FOR anyway?) its funny they choose to lead PTOs in the first place.
adults who cant communicate breed kids who cant communicate. its about not prejudging, not assuming things, but TALKING together to reach understanding. thats the problem in our neck of the woods....its all about popularity contests and personal politics, not unlike a big sorority but at the elem school parent level. when PTOs choose not to answer legit questions but rather try to shut up the parent by ostracizing them instead, it sends a very powerful message about the question, doesnt it.
18 years 6 months ago #54971 by <speakup>
Replied by <speakup> on topic RE: Bullying
kmamom commented: 'I think a large part of the problem is that the princpal and a good number of the teachers are bullies and they get away with it! The majority of parents are cowed, and when the superintendent and board of ed don't punish the bulliers and the victims (parents--and sometimes kids) are STILL victimized it sends a powerful message to the kids. '

thats right on target, that thought! the message the very people we PAY to help teach our kids how to live with ethics, morals and civilities, are the ones who close their eyes to what goes on, thereby by not condemning the bullying, passively promote it in the next generation. what kind of society do our current leaders expect, when they themselves dont have a ZERO tolerance policy for bullying???? its out of control at our school. they must think its amusement to watch the parents bully one another, kick each other off committees and PTO,and other such nonsense. www.bullyonline.org talks all about the dynamics of it. useful in corporate life too, to be aware of the phenomenon. and of course, to help educate our children to not do the same. thats best we can hope for. the PARENTS, not the SCHOOL, must 'teach the children well'
18 years 6 months ago #54970 by <speakup>
Replied by <speakup> on topic RE: Bullying
I can't imagine a PTO making someone resign for no reason. How could that happen? If you are a volunteer who gives it your all and plays nice how could they do that? Adult relationship dynamics are very different than child relationship dynamics. But at the same time kids do learn from us. If you are the type of person to complain about everything, I am sure your kids will learn to complain about everything. So it is natural that you must pick and choose your battles so to speak. If you find yourself complaining about a lot of things maybe you are the adult bully and should rethink if you are setting the proper example for your children.

Is is standing up for yourself or is it bullying? I am not really sure about all this it just struck me that one thinking they are being bullied could also be perceived as being a bully by the other side. Is is being bullied or is it adults who do not agree? I would think of adults as being equal when it came to conflict but kids mature at different rates and are not equal and sometimes may pick on the kid that is different. This whole subject has been on the boards a lot lately and has made me rethink a subject I thought I understood. But now I am not so sure. :confused:
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