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I want to quit

17 years 2 months ago #136202 by Shawn
Replied by Shawn on topic RE: I want to quit
This is why you wont/ cant quit
Ode to a Volunteer
Many will be shocked to find
When the day of judgment nears
That there's a special place in heaven
Set aside for volunteers.
Furnished with big recliners,
Satin couches and footstools,
Where there's no committee chairman,
Nor group leaders or car pools,
No eager team that needs a coach,
No festival and no bake sale,
There will be nothing to staple,
Not one thing to fold or mail,
Telephone lists will be outlawed,
But a finger snap will bring
Cool drinks and gourmet dinners,
And rare treats fit for a king.
You ask, "Who'll serve these privileged few
And work for all they're worth?"
Why all those who reaped the benefits,
And not once volunteered on earth.

~unknown

<font size=""1""><font color="#"black"">Liberalism is not an affilation its a curable disease. </font></font><br /><br><font color="#"gray"">~Wisdom of Shawnshuefus</font><br /><br><font color="#"blue""><font size=""1"">The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is...
17 years 2 months ago #136191 by pzettler
Replied by pzettler on topic RE: I want to quit
2005-2006, the PTO had died, because the parents were burned out. Test scores need improvement. The PTO needed to be revived. 2006-2007, toward the end of the year, the number of volunteers had died out. 1 event to drum up membership at the beginning of the 2006-2007 school year, an open house had netted 50 names out of an 850 student school from which to draw volunteers, but there were only about 3-4 parents doing most of the work towards the end of the year. While we held an even a month, which was a huge success for a first year, it's still not a real success, if I'm not reaching through the students and getting to the parents and homes. We need a sense of pride in the community and school.

A new plan.

Share the work!

1) Draw from a bigger pool of people.
2) Get parents involved as they join the school for the first year.
3) Go to more beginning of the year events and sign up more people.
4) Communicate, Communicate, Communicate ( I'm still learing this one)
5) Toward the end of the 2006-2007 school year attend the spring showcase to which incoming students are invited.
6) Middle of summer, have 1 meeting with the principal to get a jump start on setting dates and avoid schedule conflicts (I learned the previous year that this can take up a lot of time during meetings)
6) Before school begins, go on the bus tour where teachers hand out class schedules and sign up members.
7) Previous members get membership to next year automatically.
Membership is now 100.
7) Send home membership forms on the bottom half of a sheet of the paper, on the top half praise the things that went well last year. (There's something to sending these forms home right along side the forms they are "Required" to fill out and return). One teacher says, "Half my students have returned their forms".
Membership is now 150.
8) First meeting, 20-30 people show up. (record attendance) Interim Principal mentions and 4-5 people volunteer to mentoring tutoring program during school hours (Hey we didn't do that last year)
9) Set up a table at the open house and sign up more people and raffle off a Leap Frog Pentop computer. Membership forms completed = 17, Membership is now 250.

Where will the rest of the year go, Who knows???

My advice... The chairman of the membership committee (we don't have one) may be just as or more important than the President, Vice President, Treasurer and Secretary. I think I may have learned not to ignore that.

Now I'm learning how long it takes to type in 250 membership forms, and how hard it is to see the periods in the middle of an email address,
17 years 2 months ago #136176 by mommytlc
Replied by mommytlc on topic RE: I want to quit
I have felt the same way many, many times. I live and breathe the PTO, and I work hard making my son's school a better place. Every time I want to quit, I look at my son's cute little face and remember that I am involved because of him and for all of our students.

Hang in there, and keep doing your best for your school.
17 years 2 months ago #136067 by dlf
Replied by dlf on topic RE: I want to quit
Man--I'm trying to figure out how many times I have to read this post before I can get past being offended. Three times so far but I'm waiting till I have a positive approach...Maybe I just haven't had enough leadership experience :).
d
17 years 2 months ago #136060 by dts
Replied by dts on topic RE: I want to quit
Ok, everyone else has given you the 'chin up' & 'what you/we are doing is important' bits - they're good and important.

But here's what you need to think about when the complainers are getting to you:
1. Ask yourself first, if this is a person whom you respect.
If so, take the nugget of true criticism & say it back to her to make sure that you understand. If you are note-taker anyway, write it down. Then tell her that you will take some time to think about it and ask if she has any other feedback. Go home. Think, write, ponder and either take it or let it go - do not stew.

If it's not a person whom you respect, ask yourself this question: As I have such a low opinion of her, why should I give a flying fig about her opinion of me? When speaking with her, mentally picture an appropriate (mean) stand in for her - a sheep for the mom who doesn't want to change anything, a lollypop for the too-skinny one who keeps telling you how to do it but never shows up, a chihuahua for the yappy dad who always has to have a comment even if the topic has nothing to do with him and he knows nothing about it. Have fun with this part! Take criticism from these people very lightly & *never* personally. If they are leaders in the school, you might want to consider whether this is the right place for you.

2. Make sure that a couple of the ones you respect are with you on the Board. Make sure that they know you really want and need their feedback. If they don't tell you anything, call and ask for it - one on one and shortly after the meeting. Start the ball rolling if they don't seem to want to say anything. ("I think that I went too long on the review of the Carnival, but I wasn't sure how to move on. What did you think?")

3. Insist that criticism be given in way that has a chance of being productive. For example, another poster said that she always offers to meet with critics. You could also ask the critic to put her thoughts in writing - 'Jane, I want to make sure that I understand your thoughts on the budget so that I can address your concerns with the right person. Please drop me a quick note or email and I will get back to you within the week.' or "Debbie, you and I have very different communication styles and personalities. I know that you want this to be successful, but I'm not sure if we can work together on it and I'm not sure how much of your concern with the holiday program is personal and how much is about what works for the kids. Could you meet with Susie to work on that and then let me know what still needs my attention?"

Say any of these without anger, just very matter-of-factly. The subtext of course is "I'm a rational person invested in getting the best outcome for the organization and the school we support - - and if you disagree with my perfectly rational approach, you're not!"

Also, it makes the critics think through their issues and may actually result in feedback you can use - either personally or in directing the other parts of the PTO team.

4. Delegate AND insist on transparency in communication, status, financial matters.
The PTO Pres should not be the head of every committee and engaged in every activity. The committees should be reporting up about how projects are coming along (good & bad) and very open about financial status. The Pres is the leader and the one to hold others to account so that the group as a whole is healthy.
Make it clear that problems aren't the end of the world (usually!) and that airing them to the group let's more people help resolve them.
If you have a slacker committee, DO NOT DO THE WORK. Prod the team leader and then the rest of the committee; then remind them that the status of their project (whatever it is) will be on the Agenda for the next meeting in x# days. And follow through.
You will be called names for this approach - but not by the people who are actually doing their work. Only the slackers will have a problem with this approach and you don't need them anyway. As for the ones who decide not to like you, refer to rule 1.

5. Do not get weepy over this. Try to not lose sleep - Benedryl can help for grownups, too. Don't get too mad either, but a little dose of righteous bitchiness can be powerful.

Lastly, please remember that your role here is NOT to make everyone happy. If that were in the job description, none of us would sign on for it! Focus on leading the team so that you can support the kids and teachers. (And remember that it's only eight and a half more months!)
17 years 2 months ago #136042 by dts
Replied by dts on topic RE: I want to quit
I just broke down in tears when I read your post! i've had 2 board members quit, one because of me and one for family reasons, my principal said-you can't take it personally. and you know what? i don't anymore. i follow my bylaws and get the job done. my husband has a saying-opinions are like a-holes and everyone has one...even me!
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