Originally posted by njmom: We have ... SAHMs who don't do anything at all.
LOL. We have a ton of these.
For the problem, if I was in your position, I'd start going to meetings to make sure that the working parents are represented. Act as though maybe they really do not think that the 'working parents' are actually interested in helping out. Make them see that there are many who are excluded and that these people can benefit the group.
Just hope that those you'd be fighting for will deliver or you will just reinforce their opinions.
If you get nowhere and are motivated enough, get a presidential candidate who will include all parents, fill the election with these excluded members and vote the current group out.
Just my 2 cents here...I'm part of a board where I am the only SAHM. Everyone else works full-time or part-time. The divisive comments really need to be nipped in the bud. We have working parents who take vacation time to chair events and SAHMs who don't do anything at all. It all boils down to what we feel is important for our children. It all comes down to priorities and what we are willing to do. Ultimately, we need to be inclusive and respect each others home lives. Hopefully, your president will acknowledge that a combination of afternoon and evening meetings might get a larger audience.
I am grateful to be a stay at home mom. I'm also the PTO President, and I volunteer at the school daily. It makes me happy to be able to do that. Some working parents feel badly that they can't help out more, but our PTO does not make them feel badly. We all need to keep in mind that we are in this for the children. We sacrifice our time and energy for the betterment of the school and for our children. There is too much to do during the school year, and no one has any extra time to spend dealing with negativity.
I just have to say reference something Rosie said...you have to be sooooo careful...we all have TONS to do...and because someone is not working outside the home fulltime doesn't mean they cannot invest the time they do have elsewhere...That's what I mean about not making a deal out of the difference but working to make the whole feel proud of doing what they can and do contribute. As soon as one group feels less important than the other then you start to get the ankle biting....d
This is craziness. I hate it that some grown ups still have to act like middle schoolers -- trying to make an "out group" of anyone who doesn't live life their way.
I'm a full time lawyer and chair of our parent body. It's a leader's job to bridge gaps, not widen them. I'm exceedingly grateful, and regularly say so, that we have so many parents who don't work and who can volunteer time in the classroom, on field trips, etc. I'm also grateful that we have parent volunteers who work full time, but who make it a point to give generously of their money, and, when there are weekend or evening activities, their time.
Your president is childish and has her own "issues." That said, the problem remains of what do you do about it. Personally, if I were you, I would regularly respond to her comments with "we don't need that kind of divisiveness here. Everybody is trying to do the best that they can for their kids." I'd also make it a point to hold the meetings under my control in the evening, and whenever the chance arises, to praise loudly a working parent's volunteer activiities. "Given all you ahve to do at work, it's great that you find time to colicit auction donations too." Etc.
<beignets&coffee>
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18 years 4 months ago#105184by <beignets&coffee>
Replied by <beignets&coffee> on topic RE: Mommy wars
you have no control over peoples attitudes and discriminations, but you do have control over your vote and how it is cast, come next election time.