Along those same lines how about starting a book discussion group or a scrapbooking night out? I have friends that work from home and work outside the home. Our work does not define who we are and while we've become friends through our kids, they are no longer the thread that holds us together. Instead of being talked to about and perhaps pointing out differences, maybe a simple social event would help.
"Any advice on how to bridge the divide between the stay-at-home moms and the working moms, before an all-out war erupts? "
To an EVENING meeting, invite a speaker that talks about the pros and cons of parenthood (motherhood, specifically) in the stay at home mode and work mode, there are lots of pluses and minuses to each, and sacrifices to each also.
Maybe what the gals need is some food for thougth and a new perspective on appreciateing all people/parents, whether they work and contribut to society in that manner, or stay at home full or part time. (There are also many parents that have home based businesses, is that considered working mom or sahm? etc etc.) There is no RIGHT or BETTER way. Every family is different and all should be treated equally.
It is really a theme thats been around since the 60's, to work or not to work, which is better.
Anyway, maybe they just need to read a good book on the theme or listen to someone talk about it, to make them more open and tolerant and respectful of the 'other mom' that chose or needs to work for $$ outside the home.
Alot of good insight has been given about this issue. I would add that a person who holds a PTO board position must set an example, a good example. The best way to do that is to treat all volunteers with respect. Regardless of whether they are parents on the homefront or the workplace, everyone has something to offer and it's the boards job to find those hidden talents. Your president seems to have missed that memo.
Another problem is when women get their panties in a bunch, it's really hard to overcome. I know I will get heat for that statement but I think all of us have seen an inocuous statement or e-mail blown out of proportion by women who just...can't...let...it....go. I have been on the giving and receiving end, so I know both sides. It is just the nature of women.
While I agree that in some schools the "working" Mom's do most of the work, that is not the case in the schools I have been involved with. I think meetings should be scheduled at a time that has been proven to have the most attendance. At my son's old elementary school (my youngest is now in 8th grade)the evening meetings were poorly attended and it was the SAHM's that did the lion's share of volunteering.
Whether meetings are held during the day or during the night, the minutes should be distributed via e-mail or posted on the website for all to see. Along with minutes should be a current list of any volunteer jobs needs.
From the view point of a working mom and PTA President x 2 years and Treasurer before that. Though I truly and most sincerely appreciate the volunteer work of all my members, I have to state I get the most work and more volunteers hours from my working moms!! I myself schedule time off, take unpaid time to fill in at every event. All my chairs of committees are working moms. I just took off a week from work to help at the Holiday Shop for one week when truthfully it should have not been necessary because most moms at our school do not work. I usually get the excuse.."I have a little one at home." Well so do I and I have to drag my kids to all events. I do have some stay at home moms that bring their babies and toddlers with them;and I admire them the most that they were willing to give the effort. Also, I have to stand behind what was said earlier ....the working moms and dad are the ones that push the fundraisers at work and bring in the money. Finally, aall meetings should be scheduled in the evenings to accomodate ALL MEMBERS!!!!
