Every spring, I go through a dress code issue with my daughter. The dress code says "NO OPEN BACKED SHOES". I tell her no flip-flops. It's the rule.
Then I go to school - all the teachers are wearing mules, flip flops etc. I asked the principal about it, told him his decision would be the law in my house. He says that it's in the handbook, but it's up to the teachers to enforce and if they don't adhere to it, there's nothing he can do.
I caved and let her wear the shoes.
If the parents don't follow policy, the teachers don't enforce it, and the principal doesn't do anything, it won't happen. I agree with the others, sit back and watch it fall apart. I doubt she will send home every student that isn't in uniform. They're too concerned with attendance levels.
"Any advice? And if you've read this far...thank you. I am literally sick to my stomach over this."
actually, how about 'do nothing'?
i mean, if a principal cant enforce a no crack showing dress code, she will be in waaayyyy over her head if and when she launches a uniform rule at a public school.
who will pay for the uniforms?
what about nay sayers (who did or didnt 'vote'). will they adhere?
if kids wear low pants to school, do you think they will want to wear a uniform?
if parnets let their kids go to school with cracks showing, do you think they will run out and pay good money for a uniform?
who will keep the boys' pants at the right level? you can pull down uniform pants too, to below the navel.
etc etc etc
bottom line (LOL), if she cant enforce the rules she has now, she wont be able to enforce the dress/uniform code either.
I would just sit back and watch things evolve and say nothing.
I fail to see the connection between the prinicipal concocting a vote on enhancing the dress code and PTO. this is a school policy matter, has zero to do with PTO members votes.
i agree with the idea your principal has, but i think the manner she has gone about it, is very odd to say the least.
if youre unhappy with what is hapening, your go to person on this is the superintendent. give a call and meet and discuss. they are great people to know, in addition.
I have to imagine that when your Principal is asked about the "no response equals a yes vote" that she will say that "I just wrote that to try to get more to respond to the survey as this is a very important decision". I agree with you totally that this is a twofold problem...
First, like you, I hate this idea. She has policies in place and she needs to enforce them, not change them to make it easier.
Second is the backdoor way she's going about it.
I would recommend that if this does not get squashed by your husbands/boards influence then you need to take the next step. I would already be writing up a petition in expectation of having to take this one step further. Also you may need to hit the school board where they will feel it, and that would be their budget. If the standard policy would be that the town would have to allow those opposed to transfer within district to a school without this new dress code, put that in the petition. If they would have to provide bussing to this other school for the numerous families that would transfer then they might just think twice. Also who would have to pay for those families that could not afford these uniforms? Since this is a public school the town's school board can't enforce someone who can't afford a new uniform to purchase one, could they? Maybe the board would have to take this into account.
Now, on the other hand, since you will need to keep working with this Principal at least for a while I think you need to be careful. Maybe talk to her about other, less drastic options. For example, what about the PTO purchasing some t-shirts and/or shorts/pants/etc. for each grade. If a student is wearing what a teacher and/or Principal would feel is innappropriate then this can be used. Maybe even generate a standard note home to explain "Your child was not dressed appropriately today" to the parents.
Maybe combined, the pressure from the school board and your PTO's willingness to help enforce the current policy, she might back off.
"Out of 315 families, [B]less than 70 responded [/B]and the majority of those were in favor."
"at the next PTO meeting (which only had about 6 parents mind you)"
"meeting earlier this week at which about 12 families were in attendence"
I have taken these quotes from the original post in this thread to emphasize one point. In a democracy - people get the government they deserve. (a quote attributed to H.L. Mencken). While I may not neccesarily agree with the way your prinicipal is handling this situation in your school, I believe in this quote. I swear sometimes I think the only way to get people off their couches and get them involved is to set the couch on fire. No matter the issue - from the federal level to the PTO - if you don't voice your opinion, you're going along with whatever is being presented. Parents not answering the survey, in my opinion are yes votes and are fine with the way the principal is handling things.
As a PTO President who has "waged a war" against the principal several times, I always step back and ask my self first - "Is this my "war' or am I acting on behalf of the opinion of those who elected me?" Are you reacting to the way you are feeling about this "personal attack" or have you spoken to a majority of parents at the school and do they disagree with her?
There is only one point in your post I would protest. I would ask her to redo the ballot to exclude "The vast majority of parents are in favor of an enhanced dress code." A ballot should not sway the voter but offer information only and give the voter a chance to vote their mind without being swayed by opinion.
