Hi there,
We always encourage PTO leaders to have conversations with folks to resolve these kinds of issues. There is a chance that if you sat down with this person and had a reasonable conversation -- taking if from the place of wanting to understand where each is coming from -- then you could have good results. You could say to this person that you have observed that she is concerned about things and how can you help? Try to get a sense of where she is coming from. She may not fully understand her role -- that may be challenging for her because she is also a teacher. She may be a worried or nervous person. You just don't know until you have a conversation. In that conversation, as long as no one gets defensive, you can explain how things typically work and help her to understand her role.
I am seeking advice on how to address an overly involved PTO member who happens to be an elected executive officer.
From the time she was elected I have witnessed her interject herself into several functions and projects that do not fall under her elected position's responsibilities. This has caused a few hassles but I was able to address them all before any real problems occurred. I am just learning that a problem has occurred. And to me, it's a big one.
Last night this member made me aware of some changes that were supposed to happen with an annual event scheduled to occur in three days despite the fact that it was already voted on and set. She also expressed her discomfort with the changes and raised some objections that some of the staff had communicated to her. I was able to communicate with my fellow PTO members via e-mail and we all concluded we had to go forward as originally voted; it was just too short of a notice to make such big changes.
Today I was made aware of the fact that this member knew of these proposed changes for the last month or so and had apparently led the teachers to believe this was all taken care of and agreed upon. As a result of all of this, the event just will not be able to happen. And due to that, I am having to scramble at the last minute to do some "damage control" between our teachers and PTO members. We as a PTO have other options to replace what we usually do at this time of year. But I am personally upset by this. It had become an event the staff looked forward to and appreciated.
This person's behavior has me and the principle both very frustrated. Today I made it clear to the principle that this person is not who they all need to speak with and asked that she make this clear to the teachers. Tomorrow I will send out cards reminding the teachers who they can contact for future PTO assistance in hopes that this will not happen again.
The principle is planning to speak to this member as she is also a teacher at the school. But as the PTO president I feel I should address her as well. I want to make it clear to her that I appreciate her efforts, spirit and drive but that I think it would be best if she stayed focused only on the position she was voted into. She is stretching herself too thin and it is causing problem.
In my completely nonobjective opinion, it's as if she has elected herself president or just does not understand the reason and need for our different positions and chairpersons. She is making decisions on her own that we as a PTO are being held accountable for without our input or agreement, as if she were "The PTO" and not just a fellow officer and member. I truly appreciate all of our members and their efforts. Many of us are new to this but we are working to clean up a bit of a mess left over from the previous year. And seeing how this is my first year as president, I do not need the added stress.
Is it appropriate for me to address her as well? If so, how do I go about doing it in a diplomatic but firm manner? Face to face or in a written format?
Thank you for any advice shared. I will consider all points made on this and will answer any questions asked.
