Thank you for the very sound advice. Things have become rather more frustrating with this person, to the point we may need to get our state PTA involved.
I do think much of the advice is good in general - appointing more than one person to chair such a huge event, trying to find a good fit for someone who is better with ideas that people and ensuring other parents have a chance to help with things. I will pass everything along to my husband.
If she is great at ideas and big picture things, let her take that role and get things started but be straight with her that her interpersonal skills and ability to manage the events are lacking - and let others (multiple people even) run different aspects of the event (food, games, decorations, etc..). You don't need one person to micro manage all the pieces.
This person likely won't like the straight talk, but might find it more rewarding to have that "big idea" then back off a bit and just help.
Also, I'd spread the wealth and have your husband designate more than one chair for things. Assign 3 or 5 for the event. It's a large event and give each person a specific role and let each be empowered over their individual committees and tasks.
I would line up other people before the events next year and tell her that it is only fair to offer other parents the opportunity to be involved and that since she has already chaired the event that you would like her to be involved in another manner.
If she is not on the board then she does not actually have the decision making power. If she is over bearing then I would possibly set up some closed meetings and speak with the Principal about making sure the parent does not over step her bounds.
One good thing that we have in our by-laws is that a person cannot hold the same office for more than two years. I think it was set to insure that you could only have two years of really bad management from any one person.
I would greatly appreciate advice on how to work with a challenging volunteer. This parent has tons of great ideas, but is not good at implementing them (others usually end up doing the work). Currently she is chairing our end of year carnival. Her approach (not listening to others' ideas, complaining when we asked her to present a budget for board approval, pushy) has ended up frustrating many involved parents. To the point where one parent who is helping with the carnival now doesn't want to do some events next year.
As as incoming officer for next year, what is the best way to work with such a person?
She even went as far as to ask our school principal to meet with her - and then sent a message saying we had to be at the meeting (my husband is incoming president) because she needed to talk about next year. She indicated the principal called the meeting, but turns out she did - and then said my husband had to go to the meeting. She has said that she needs to tell us how we should run things next year and that she is going to be a board member. She had the chance to run for VP, but declined.
We want to include all parents and to encourage their sharing of ideas, talents and energy. This one person is really hard to work with...and I fear we are now losing volunteers because of her.
What are our options? What is the best way to work with her (and I've tried a personal conversation with her, but that didn't work). It is actually possible to ask that a parent not be involved - or at least, not in charge of an event? I realize this should be last case, but from what I understand - she was asked to leave the PTA at another school.
