Thanks Landers--I guess I should rephrase this question--has anyone else had this problem and how did it end for them? What was determined, what was the outcome---that's what I'm trying to find out. (I can't believe in Virtus/Protecting God's Children, that there's no articles on teacher favoritism and special priveleges, unless a physical line has been crossed)
What you had suggested is actually that's pretty much where it started. . a parent casually mentioning to others that their child had come home complaining about some of the things this teacher had said, about the favoritism and the class pet for the younger class, and other parents adding "yours too???" That led to note comparing notes and seeing a lot of consistency in the issues, comments made, and how this teacher was handling certain students. We went through this last year with his coaching---favoring some students more than others--even though the skill level of the favored students wasn't better. He'd make excuses for his decisioins that parents familiar with the sport said were "lame." We tried to approach him with our concerns last year (our child was leaving each practice and game trying not to cry until finally she let out that felt left out like he didn't want her on the team---something we were witnessing too--even though in the end, her stats were better than his favorite), and he made a lame excuse and HE escalated it to the then principal to be backed. It became quite ugly (we raised his principal a pastor, and almost went up to the diocese level), though the result was our child did finally get the play time she should have had based on the fact that she was a more senior player on the team and his favorites, by league rules, shouldn't have even been allowed to play except in extreme circumstances.
Right now, we're all in a wait and see pattern. I know each parent with a concern has gone in separately, and the principal came into class while this teacher was absent recently and asked some non-leading questions about certain things in the class and the students were forthcoming about their frustrations. I know I have an email about another issue with this teacher that's not as much related to the favoritism but his evasiness in answering questions I've asked four times and inconsistent information regarding fundraising for a trip that's going to be escalated if there's not more transparency in the next week.
Problem is--he's a sneaky one...an adult Eddie Haskell. He puts on this polite act, very professional/helpful/cheerleader when the principal is around, when there's a group of parents, when he has to respond via email. He's supposedly "shy" but I can see there's this smugness to him that requires a lot of self restraint in dealing with him at times. I've seen some of his on-line commenting on social network sites---even though his pages are locked down, he does comment on more open walls I've found. The smugness/snarkiness is very much there in his comments. He's been known to stop with his favoritism for a bit, only to let it quietly start up again when he thinks people have forgotten. That's what I'm afraid is going to happen.
It's a small school, small community--but not as small minded as he claims.