Yeah know it's funny how PTO's write by-laws to help them along in times like this but we forget or there is nothing there to cover a situation like this. I could not agree more with LOVEMYKIDS about the relationship between the PTO and the Principal is key to a successful year (I myself have been blessed with a terrific Principal whom I would also consider a good friend) but this is a tricky balancing act if this is someone's first year.
As far as the money issue of $2000 for "her" can this vote be postponed until someone can see if you can do this? Let me explain, our PTO can transfer money from our account to say the kitchen's account BUT we need a reciept and documentation of what the money was needed for. Does that make sense? We just don't give someone cash because they want it, well, we can't either as we have a small budget but anyway, you gotta give the Principal credit for wanting to be involved! really......
This issue has been discussed before in other posts and if you look around you might find some answers in one of them. I have been very fortunate in that our principal is wonderful and gives us a lot of freedom in our activities. However, I believe that freedom comes from us maintaining a great level of communication with her on what we are doing. She sits on our Board and she and I talk at least weekly about anything that is going on with the PTO and the school. She knows that we are here to improve the children's educational opportunities and we know that this is HER school and we respect that. All that said, I would recommend that someone from the organization sit down with her and discuss goals--what does she want to see for the school and what do the parents want. I bet you can find a lot of common ground. Next have discussion about the fact that the PTO operates to benefit the school and that it is a membership organization in which all decisions of what events to pursue and how to spend the money raised are voted on by the membership. Simply explain how the parents are feeling about her level of control and that it could very negatively affect parent participation and therefore the success of any programs the PTO sponsors/funds. Make sure you listen carefully to her questions, answers and opinions. Is she just afraid you may do things without her knowledge? Does she feel left out of the loop in activities? Or is she just controlling in all her behavior? Try to come to some agreement on communication and who has what level of control. For a parent organization to truly be a success, it must work within the operational structure of the school. It must also follow it's by-laws and remain a member organization where decisions are made by the group not an individual. Good luck.
Our Principal (new, this year) has been slowly and steadily taking over the PTO! She's sticking her nose in every single nook and cranny, every fundraising decision...even trivial things...the officers are feeling very unempowered and are really getting fed up with her. The Principal maintains that she is in charge of the PTO and that EVERYTHING must be approved by her and she has final say. She also wants $2000 out of our budget for a discretionary Principal's Fund, for her to do with as she sees fit. She wants to remove this money from the PTO account and put it in the school's account. What do you all think and what can we do? We're losing all input and being treated like little worker ants run by "the Queen".