Advice from PTO Today

Elly writes:

Elly is sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like you’d be a big help and an asset to your parent group, so don’t give up!

Elly has seen this happen many times and can think of four possible scenarios why your president hasn’t dialed your digits and asked for help. Here’s some insight into what she’s thinking, and some tips on how you can get her to start calling on you, too:

She just doesn’t know you. Entrusting a newbie to carry out a task is a huge leap of faith for many officers. Instead of asking how you can help, give her the scoop on the specific skill set you can offer to help the group. For example: “I’m a writer and I’d love to publish the PTO newsletter”; “When I was Cub master, I planned spaghetti dinners”; “I worked as a classroom aide in the kindergarten class.” She’ll then have a better idea of how to tap into your skills more effectively and, ideally, put you to work.

She’s just too overwhelmed to plan in advance. You’ve probably noticed that PTO officers are busy parents with kids. Now Elly knows they mean well, but sometimes the fact that they take on a little more than the average joe means they often leave things for the last minute (which often leads to the third scenario). Let her know you’d be happy to step up (perhaps as her new volunteer coordinator?) to help her find the right people for the right roles in future PTO activities.

She just finds it easier to call her friends. When your PTO president is in a bind (“Can you pick up 10 cases of soda before 6 p.m. tonight?”), she probably doesn’t feel right imposing on someone who has never volunteered before. So she calls upon her tried-and-true PTO buddies. She never intends for it to happen, but inevitably, eager would-be volunteers, like you, see the group as a clique. Elly says to get her to call upon you and others for future events and activities, ask her to write up a to-do list a few weeks in advance, then ask her which tasks she’d like to delegate.

She’s just a control freak. Because some presidents have been doing this involvement thing for so long, they’re inclined to think that newcomers, if given a chance, will change things around—or, worse, screw thing up. Your president might feel better if you first trained alongside her or another seasoned officer. If that’s the case, an effective approach might go something like this: “Is there someone on the PTO board who could show me how to run the copier? I heard the teachers are looking for a copy mom.”

If you’re still getting no volunteer assignments after making countless offers, you might ask the principal whether she or her teachers need your assistance. Elly has never met a teacher who would down a parent’s offer to help with recess duty!

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Community Advice

badpants writes:
I would contact the chairperson of the event you'd like to help with and contact them directly. That's the problem with general sign up sheets, they probably are not making it to the person responsible for securing enough help to run the event smoothly. We put out a info sheet at the start of the school year. It's lists all the events and committee's we sponsor, with a description of the event, as well as the chairperson and contact info. Our hope is that by doing this, it might encourage and engage new parents. I think parents want to help, they just don't know how.

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