Just from your first post it sounds like this teacher is very schedule orientented and wants to give every parent a chance to help without disrupting her routine. I am sure she has nothing personal against you and she is just trying to do her job effectively. Tell you you'd like to help out more and since all her slots are taken she may help you find other areas. Maybe there is another teacher that needs help. Don't forget about playground and lunchroom monitoring, library, and I am sure your parent group leader could use a hand from time to time. Want to come and help me?
Honestly, I always feel that I am more of a disruption to my children when I try to help in their rooms, even if it's making copies. I always try to help in rooms that my children are not a part of, hopefully to build a relationship to work off of when my child is in that class in the future, or just to ease someone's load.
I see it this way, my children know I care and that I am trying to make the school as good as it can be. The other children see me as a an adult they can talk to, trust, and wish their parents were more like me.
If you are good friends with this person, ask her why the change of attidtude. It could easily be any of the reasons listed on this post or something else, but know this, there is always a teacher or student out there who could use some support in one way or another.
The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating-in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life. --Anne Morris
If you want to have a friendship with this woman, what's wrong with treating it like any other friendship? Ask her to lunch, to go shopping, or some other non-school activity. If she continually turns you down, you'll have to let it go, but at least give it your best shot.
AZ mom - Everyone who has replied has given you very sound, level headed advise. You will not get that from me.
You sound like you were really looking forward to having a warm, close relationship with a teacher who you thought of as a friend. Instead you got dismissed, in an ever so polite, politically correct way.
So allow yourself to feel hurt. Feel bad, feel sad, lick your wounds, eat ice cream, go shopping, go pout, rant and generally be disagreeable. Then after all that, pull yourself together, tell yourself that maintaining a good relationship with this teacher is the best thing you can do for your child, so that is exactly what you will do. And do it...
Hi AZ Mom, It sounds like your youngest child has a hard-working, dedicated teacher to me! My best guess would be that the curriculum in your school's kindergarten has changed in many ways since your older children were five years old; I know I've found that to be the case this year with my youngest in kindergarten. With the "standards'-based education" of today, teachers have so much material that is required to be covered (No Child Left Behind!) that their lessons can be almost scripted. Every instructional second counts. My observation is that we parents, while supportive and friendly to the teachers, are often a distraction from all they have to accomplish in a short time. This teacher sounds like she is focusing on her lessons to the children and wants to establish boundaries for herself, so that she can concentrate on giving her all to her students. In the instruction-dense classroom of today, unfortunately teachers don't always have the luxury of nurturing the camaraderie of parent helpers during class time. My suggestion would be to help this teacher when you can and turn your energies toward volunteering jobs in the school where you can work closely with and get to know other parent volunteers, who often are interested in AND have the time for the camaraderie of sharing in meaningful tasks.
Good luck, and congratulations on having such a focused teacher for your kindergartner!
I know our HSA makes a point of letting every parent who volunteers attend at least one event. (This is not weekly volunteer time but scheduled classroom events). This allows all parents a chance to link up with the teacher and the class.