Wow, this is very interesting to me. At our school (K3-8), parents aren't ever really used for tutoring. Now, it's a small private religious school and the class size is such that the teachers can usually handle the classes (13-17 students per class). I have never in my 6 years at the school seen a parent "tutoring" a child. Now, parents ARE used for things like helping out at lunch and serving ice cream and driving field trips and opening car doors in the morning but NOT ever in the classroom.
PMCW

In a school where the focus is on academics (I would put it different if I knew how better to explain our school. Our teachers are EXTREME in their focus on academics), classrooms stop using parents mostly by 4th grade. They still use them for field trips, costumes, projects that include spray painting or heavy duty glues, etc. Other than that, parents aren't invited to be in the classrooms. This isn't a PTO thing, this isn't even a school thing. It is a teacher thing. Pizza parties and the like are done in the lunch room except on rare occasions. Teachers here feel that 4th grade is where students learn to take responsibility for themselves in all things, from homework to classwork, to parties, etc. Sure, there are always some classes that still encourage parents to tutor, to read, to help with art, but for the most part they ask parents not to come to the classrooms.

Now, on the other hand, the lower grade (K-3) teachers are jonesing for help. They have parents who help out with parties and field trips galore, but few who are willing to come in 3 or 4 times a week to tutor. My son is in 4th grade. I tutor 4 mornings a week in a first grade class. I work with 6 students (in two groups of 3 now, but we started with individual tutoring) each morning. These are students who are way behind in reading. Once they are caught up, we switch them with other students who are behind. My husband helps with math tutoring in the afternoons 2 times a week. Our son knows that even though we are not helping in his class, that we are helping others who really need us. We help him with his homework at home, we have lunch with him and his class (in the lunchroom...lol...) a couple times a month. He knows I am on the school grounds most of the day volunteering in some way or another, whether it be filing stuff in the office, tutoring first graders, answering phones, counter help, running forgotten lunch boxes to students, helping the nurse with hearing/vision testing, etc. He takes pride in that and I think it helps him to do well in school. He sees me now and again and knows that I am there for every student, but mostly he knows I am there for him if he needs me.

Thing is, it is up to the teacher, not the parent, to have help in their classroom. Our district certainly encourages it, but leaves it up to the individual teacher. One of our Gifted Program teachers has never had a parent helper. He doesn't want one. EVER...lol... His whole focus is on academics and students. Hell, he even hates that he has to wait for morning announcements...lol... But his class is academically in the top 1% of the country.

I don't know what advice I'd give other than to maybe explain to parents that when push comes to shove, it is up to the teachers. Tell them to keep offering to help their childs class, but to find other ways to help in the school like tutoring a first grader who is behind in reading or math. Having lunch with your student and their classroom (in the lunchroom...lol...) is just as important to your child as helping in their classroom.

Good Luck!

Your situation is not an unusual one, but nonetheless still distressing. You are absolutely correct that research shows that students do better in school when their parents are involved. A suggestion would be to look into the research and make it available to the school staff. Secondly, what I'm imagining the new parents are balking at is that they don't feel welcome. This is huge. If parents don't feel welcomed by the school that means there is very little trust between the staff and the families. This is not good for the students. I encourage you to buck status quo a little and look into the benefits of developing trusting relationships between home and school and involving all families in their children's education. You might look at www.partnershipschools.org. Good luck!

We are on our third school district and from what I've found, every school is different in how they handle the parent volunteers and even every classroom is different. In my youngest son's school, parents can volunteer in the classroom in Kindergarten and first grade. After that parents (whatever number the teacher chooses) can help out with parties, field trips whatever. We do have a volunteer sign up sheet that we give out at the beginning of the year - one for PTA specific things, like a publishing center, family game night, etc and then another one just for the classrooms. In some grades, the teacher chooses who goes on a field trip, in another the homeroom parent does it. We encourage the homeroom parents to not just pick the people they know.
The classroom one will ask if you want to help out with: bulletin boards, one on one help with children, parties, field trips, just bringing in something for a party, etc. We have one homeroom parent per classroom with the exception of kindergarten and first grade, where we have 2.
I think it's just a matter of parents getting used to it, right? I was taken aback when I realized that I would no longer be able to help out in my son's classroom after 2nd grade, but I did get over it. There sure is enough other stuff to get involved in, if it can't be in the classroom, then what else can you do?

I can see where the parents are coming from. I love being in the classroom, even if it is only to cut out art projects. There are many behind the scenes projects, correcting papers, recording scores in the books, cutting out projects, running copies. The parents do not have to work directly with the children while they are in the classroom. It is hard to believe that teachers do not want help with these things that take up their time afterschool and in the evenings. Every year my role in the classroom changes. Some teachers want help with the students, helping a struggling one with a problem, supervising the students on the computers and sometimes just cutting out art projects.
I don't know where I am going with this, just that if I were to move to a school that did not want me to help, I would be concerned. Not concerned that something was going on in the classroom that they did not want me to see, but concerned that the teachers would get burned out.
In our school (at K-3 and a 4-8), if you want to help, our teachers will find you something to do.

I don't think we'd necessarily be a poster child for "parent involvement", but I do like our philosophy.

We don't have "PTO events" and "School events". Yes the PTO takes the lead on some items, but one of our core functions is to identify volunteers. ALL volunteers, not just for PTO things. We collect the information, we put it into a massive spreadsheet and share it with classes/grades. Sure the teachers get additional help one on one because of the parents they see often.

But if the school needs volunteers, the PTO helps recruit and organize them.

Can you work with school leadership to list ALL volunteer opportunities? Classroom help, party help, lunchroom assistance, workroom tasks, teacher appreciation, after school activities.... Surely there are areas the school would like to expand if they could get the help (after school clubs??). Try to show the parents that there isn't necessarily LESS involvement, just perhaps different categories of involvement.

The other key is communication. You probably know how much more you understand as a parent if you are spending time in the classroom or working up at school on some project. If some of those opportunities aren't available, how can you help bridge the gap on some of the lost communication.

I wish you luck in your merge. It will work out eventually.

P.S. Make sure some of the "new" parents are involved in this process. They should be helping develop the volunteer information, not just being the audience receiving the info.

[ 02-26-2004, 07:30 PM: Message edited by: JHB ]