Well, I've downloaded these posts, and plan on bringing this up. Depending on how it goes at the next meeting, we WILL be going higher up with this issue. We're going to be stepping on some toes (and anybody following my posts concerning our playground project knows this is something I've been avoiding), including the principal, because it's pointing out she should have known better, and doesn't have that much control over our PTA board at this point. But to me the issues here are just too absurd to be ignored.

melloweer--the teachers didn't demand the PTA do this, but they certainly had no problem with spending the money and being the only members of the committee. In their defense I think they're just clueless and don't understand how a PROPER PTO/PTA is run. In our school "the PTA" isn't viewed as the parents, it's perceived as the board, so if they say OK it must be OK, especially if the principal/VP doesn't have a problem with it. My issue here is less with the teachers, and more with the principal for not thinking.

The silver lining: parents who've been hearing about this that DON'T attend meetings regularly now WILL be! Maybe this is the extreme move the groups having problems with parent participation need to take to get people involved--spend money irresponsibly or in a controversial way [img]tongue.gif[/img] !

Please keep the posts coming, and thank you all for your support!

[ 04-17-2004, 10:46 AM: Message edited by: kmamom ]

I have to agree with you about the problem of having too many memorials. I live in one of the school district's that had school shootings and you can imagine how fun it is for students to face memorials.
It is important to make people feel appreciated but as you said, who wants to go to school in a cemetary? Like kids need help being depressed.
Adults may not see the explanations often, but bored or inquisitive students will see it more often because they spend so much time on campus.

I am not saying they don't deserve to be remembered, but the current students' feelings should be considered in my opinion.

[ 04-17-2004, 02:06 AM: Message edited by: nonsequitur ]

The teachers went ahead and basically said PTO is paying for these trees without the PTO voting on spending the funds???

I called my state President on this one and although we don't have the right to say what happens in NJ, you are not at all out of line in questioning this. If this issue is important enough to you, first try to get several parents together and address your concerns (which are very valid) It's hard to retaliate against a larger number and you are also members of this PTA and you have every right as such. (We both agree with you by the way, it's maudlin!) Secondly, if it is not a budget item then the expense should be voted on. (If your PTA has a policy that a certain amount can be spent without approval and that policy had been voted on then they can do it if it falls within the policy) And just like the playground issue (good time to throw this back in their faces) PTA's should provide service, not material items for the school. (They set the precedent at your unit, you didn't)
You could also, however, suggest that they vote to put up a memorial to remember All (instead of several individuals)with one placque and several trees (reason being that "we do not want to offend anyone that may be left out in the decision process and that no persons life should be deemed more worthy than anothers"). You could also mention that by continuing to put more trees up in memorial, you are lessening the gesture that was made for the first two. (ideas when approaching it)- I like this approach better because you won't sound like you don't care but that you are concerned that others feelings will be hurt.
If you feel passionately enough about it, you can then take it to your council (I know you think they will get backing but even friends correct each other now and then) and if that doesn't work then you go to the State office to protest it.
Your board continues to get away with what they do because everyone is afraid to fight them but IT IS YOUR RIGHT! to do so.

kmamom,
I don't think you're out of line at all by speaking up. I would think that that board shouldn't be making arbitrary spending decisions without the entire organization. I also think it should be voted on as to whether a committee should be stood up to make recommendations to the organizations as to who gets honored with a tree. To me, it makes perfect sense to honor someone who has a direct connection to the school, but not necessarily to the district.
You're not off the mark.
Good luck.

A couple of years ago, a student (a teen) died from cancer. His parents were very involved in volunteering in the school district, and a tree was dedicated in his memory in front of the school. The PTA paid for this. We all thought it was a nice idea. Then I happened to notice another tree, with another dedication, this time the name I didn't recognize. I asked, and found out it was the name of an adult who died (I suppose any death of a loved one is tragic, but this had a sad story attached to it) who's parent works for the school district. The PTA also paid for this one, and to my knowledge there wasn't any vote, it was decided "outside" the regular meeting by the officers and principal.

It's the sort of thing that you pass by without really looking at it, but those who have noticed it were a little taken aback, but since most don't go to the PTA meetings they weren't aware the PTA paid for it so they really didn't think about it. There have been a couple of comments about it becomming a "cemetary" however.

Then at the last PTA meeting, it was mentioned that a couple of the teachers will be accepting "nominations" for the next TWO trees. I was startled, but without knowing the details I refrained from comment.

I asked the secretary of the PTA, who is AGAINST the idea, and she said the PTA was paying for them, that the teachers took it upon themselves to be the "nominating committee," and that the principal and VP are fine with all this. I mentioned this to several other parents, who were really upset when they heard about it. First because who are these teachers (popular as they may be) to decide who gets "honored", second because how do you determine who's memory is more worthy than another, third because it's going to be a little maudlin out there with all these honored trees, and last becuase the PTA board is using our funds to pay for this.

I know the PTA board is going to get around this by saying, "the money spent DOES benefit the entire school--it's beautifying the grounds," and by saying, "Why should they care how the money is spent--they don't come to the meetings anyway." The fact that this was never voted on or discussed openly is BESIDE the point I suppose.

Should I open my big mouth at the next meeting? I'd try to get others to come with me, but it's fruitless, because: a) people fear confrontation with this crew, b) people fear there will be petty retaliatory measures taken against them and thier kids, especially since the principal, VP and teachers are involved, and c) the old, "why should I bother stirring up a hornets nest and getting stung since my voice doesn't matter anyway" syndrome.

What do you all think? Are we who disagree with this memorial business out of line? Is this appropriate? Help!!