I understand how you feel. I try to avoid even the appearance of favoritism. (I don't want to know how my son might act if he thought he would be cut any slack because of my involvement in the school.) Other kids pick up on who the favorites are, too. Their hurt feelings are usually what their upset parents are reacting to when problems arise.

My advice? Talk to the principal to let her know your concerns. If there truly are extra spots available, ask for your other two children's names to be put in a hat with others who weren't chosen in the first go-round.

Remember, though, that know matter to what lengths you go to avoid it, someone will always be ready to claim favoritism is shown. Nothing you can do about that.

Our school is a balanced calendar school, meaning the kids are out fewer weeks in the summer, but have three 3 week breaks throughout the year. It all adds up to the same amount of time, just spread out differently. During our intercessions, we have always had enrichment classes, fun yet educational classes that the kids really love. There is a lot of competition to get into these classes since thre isn't enough money to fund them for every student.

This year money was cut even further so that we are only offering two enrichment programs instead of three. This year a lottery system was used to choose the students who will be participating. My youngest daughter was chosen, but not my older two. I am completely fine with that--that's how the lottery works.

At a parent focus group meeting (not PTO), we were discussing the enrichment program and I mentioned to the principal that my youngest was chosen, just chatting, not complaining in any way. She said she knew and apologized. I assured her I had no problem with it.

That afternoon I got notice in the other two kids' bookbags that they had indeed been chosen to participate in the enrichment program. This upset me a bit because while I don't want my kids to suffer because I am sometimes a rabble rouser, I also don't expect favortism of any kind. I don't dare mention this to any other parents, as I know there will be some anger and hard feelings towards the principal over this.

Should I tell the principal how I feel about this or just let it go this time? What would you do?