If someone at the school does want to make a complaint, here are some of the first steps:

1 Make a "diary" of times, days and incidents that have been inappropriate. These need to include exactly what was said and done and to whom. A list of kids involved or witnessing the incident will help.

2 Take it up with the teacher in a calm manner to explain that even if he/she is unaware, the students are uncomfortable with certain situations. Ask for a change. Do this kindly.

3 If the teacher doesn't respond, then go up the chain of command. Keeping track along the way of who you spoke with and what they said.

This is modeled after the procedure of many companies' and universities' sexual harassment policies. The real key here is that the journal becomes a legal document if needed and that you tried to resolve this reasonably before calling on the director of the school or someone higher.

It is a very sad fact that much of the traditional boy behavior is considered bad behavior. My son has been subject to this before. Since he really does have ADHD, it causes all kinds of learning and social problems.

Some teachers simply don't know how to teach certain personalities. It's a common part of self preservation to ignore our own faults and see something like this as a problem with the student. If you find yourself in this situation, maybe teaching the teacher how to deal with the situations better is an option. I know if I had to deal with my son's former teacher about this again now that I'm more informed, she would have responded to kindly made suggestions.

Touching on what Michelle B said, there may be truth to this or there may not be. I have learned in life that many people have their own agendas and like to talk crap.

I think my response to your wanting to make a complaint got buried in the rest of the answer. The issue regarding how boys are treated is statistically and doesn't refer to all schools or experiences.

You can't make a complaint based on hearsay. I agree with Serendipity in that people do like to talk crap and their experience or opinions may have nothing to do with you.
You need to have your own first hand experiences to make any kind of complaint and you need to keep an open mind until something if anything happens. You can't expect the worst, but being prepared with information isn't expecting the worst either. It's just giving you enough knowledge to address an issue should one arise.

Hi! Touching on what Michelle B said, there may be truth to this or there may not be. I have learned in life that many people have their own agendas and like to talk crap. At the end of the summer when the class placements came out all I heard was all kinds of nonsense about the teacher my daughter was going to have. I was devestated listening to these people and thinking of the terrible year my kid was in for. Well, I must say now that this teacher is wonderful and my daughter loves her...all the kids in the class love her. So I had myself all worked up for nothing. Also I must tell you that some people told me this teacher hated girls and some people told me she hated boys...lol. So in the end I learned a valuble lesson and I will never again listen to what people want to say about teachers and I will judge them for myself.

oops! Even without "the district" you really have to be careful here. If I were in your shoes I would talk to parents whose boys were in her class and encourage them to talk to the Principal. (now I'm worried about mispeaking again - is there a Principal??) good luck!

Kathie-first, Allora is from a Private school, she doesn't have to deal with the district.

Allora- you will however, have to deal with the staff of this school. You really do need to be careful not to make a complaint based on hearsay. We all know the telephone game, it may not be as bad as it has been represented.
As for the issues with boys, I have pretty good experience here. I've done quite a bit of research on the issue and there is widespread misconceptions and mistreatment. I'll give a brief example. More boys than girls are tested and treated for disabilities like ADD. However, studies have shown that boys learn from active play (including play violence like cowboys and indians, cops and robbers), have difficulty sitting still and for quite some time now their active persons are not allowed to do what they have been physically programmed to do.
Boys nerves also develop slower than girls making it more difficult for them to do things like hold a pencil correctly and control their penmanship. This has often led to boys being labled as developmentally slow when it is just a matter of physiology.
There is so much more to it and in fact, Reader's Digest did an excellent article on this a little while ago called "Are Boys the Weaker Sex". It goes into detail the number of boys vs girls that are placed on drugs like Ritalin and how some of the restrictions that we place on them actually hinders their mental growth. It also goes into detail how more girls than boys are going on to universities and excelling in high school.
I tried to find the article online but I had read it when I got the Digest, I only found a reference to it and it was negative. (Feminist hoo-ha type rebuke)
I feel as though I am constantly defending my son. I talk to many other mothers of boys who feel the same way. I even have one friend whose son is being treated for severe depression and he is 9 years old. Do some research and arm yourself with facts.
I made copies of that article and gave it to his teacher and the principal and kept it until my husband "cleaned" and now it's in a box somewhere in the garage. Review the studies that are being done and make certain that you keep those your son is in contact with, aware. Follow the suggestions of this other teacher too. No need to set your son up in a destructive situation and being in a private school, one that you may not be able to rectify. Heck, even in public schools it's hard.

Sorry to have gone so long (hope I didnt' go off subject), but it hit a nerve.

allora,
Maybe I'm misunderstanding you, but are you thinking of filing a complaint about a teacher that your child has never had and you've never really had direct contact with? I would step carefully here. In most school districts, there has to be first hand knowledge of wrong-doing before there even an investigation.