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Parent vs. PTA Cliche

20 years 8 months ago #64833 by eisner
Replied by eisner on topic RE: Parent vs. PTA Cliche

Originally posted by ralphie4:
Thanks for the feedback. Unfortunately we are not in a position to move to new school, because we would probably have to move to a new neighborhood. Part of the problem, I think, is the fact that the community we live in is somewhat isolated, and a great distance from other schools in the district. The school is a newer, nice and clean place, as opposed to some of the other options. While I do not feel that a self-selected group of parents and staff should be allowed to run certain parents out of town or into submission, we will do what is best for our child. Fortunately, my son's teacher this year is great! This year he is being treated fairly in the classroom, and is bloeeoming. This teacher took a special liking to our son, and is fostering his skills and talents. As a parent we can not ask for more. Sadly, because this teacher has chosen to like us and son and people, and likes our kid, she has had to endure a great deal of flak from certain collegues, as well as other PTA parents who's child is in my son's class. A teacher should not have to feel that she has "to stand her ground" in order to treat of son fairly. My wife and I are now feeling that we not only have to protect our child while on that campus, but his teacher as well. As we have come to find out, other parents have similar concerns, but these PTA teachers and parents went out of their to make our experience a very public one. Thus, we can not blame other parents for not speaking up after they hear what we went through. Ironically, I understand the value of the PTA, and the positive effect it can have in a school. How does one "clean PTA house" in order to break up the cliche. We found out the hard way that even being PTA president doesn't empower one to breakup a self-selected/elected PTA executive commitee?

20 years 8 months ago #64832 by ralphie4
Replied by ralphie4 on topic RE: Parent vs. PTA Cliche
Thanks again for the feedback.

Michelle, as I remember it, the state council had the county rep mediate. She was very experienced, and could not believe how disorganized the financial books the PTA was. Before even speaking with "the other side" (the executive council and principal) she put a freeze on all PTA spending and programs until the investigation was completed. By this time, my wife was far into our pregnancy (9th month), was told she could no longer volunteer in my son's classroom, and overall stayed away from the campus. Of course, the PTA parents and staff let it be known that the PTA programs were cancelled because of my wife, so you guess how popular we were. After meeting with the PTA membership, the County PTA rep urged my wife not to continue to fight, given her pregnancy and the ferver of the PTA membership to get her to resign. She seemed to like my wife, and was worried about her. After much consideration, we decided to take her advise, hoping that these PTA ladies would ease off on us and our son. They did not, and have not. Granted, being a former school board member from a different district, this PTA and school district did not expect our ability to fight back. As a parent, the school board policies provide as means to report and complain about teachers and staff. My question is how does a parent take on the PTA? At least the membership at a specific school. While we have had to involve attornies in order to get at least the school employees and principal to back off, who wants to sue their own kid's school. Besides, the school district has deeper pockets than we do. Has a parent ever sued a PTA member?

I appreciate the feedback, if only not to feel so isolated. Thank you.
20 years 8 months ago #64831 by Michelle B
Hi, been out for a while with pneumonia and likely not to stay too long now, but wanted to let you know that state isn't the last word. It is hard when you are the only parents speaking up though. It also sounds like you have the small town thing going also and it is a different world there. You can try to take it higher. In other words, National but make certain you have all your ducks in a row before you do. I'm a little unclear about how the mediation went (I am assuming that is what state did?) Was your wife asked to resign per the state board or did she get tired of fighting? Could you e-mail me with more details and as I get a little better i will try to help you out. Gotta run though, very tired!
20 years 8 months ago #64830 by TheMetzyMom
Replied by TheMetzyMom on topic RE: Parent vs. PTA Cliche
We have several PTA folks who post regularly. I think that they may have an answer better suited to your problem.

I'm sure that this is one area where PTA may be better than a PTO because it is a national organization, with very organized rules and regulations. In a PTO, the Board sort of IS the boss, whereas in the PTA there are folks above the individual schools. It may be that you need to visit their site (I'm sure someone will post it here, you can check other threads for the site address or you can type National PTA into any search engine and get it) and find the 'contact us' usually located at the bottom of the home page.

Regardless, keep your chin up, your child safe, the teacher in your prayers and your foot in the door...

Good Luck!
20 years 8 months ago #64829 by ralphie4
Replied by ralphie4 on topic RE: Parent vs. PTA Cliche
Thanks for the feedback. Unfortunately we are not in a position to move to new school, because we would probably have to move to a new neighborhood. Part of the problem, I think, is the fact that the community we live in is somewhat isolated, and a great distance from other schools in the district. The school is a newer, nice and clean place, as opposed to some of the other options. While I do not feel that a self-selected group of parents and staff should be allowed to run certain parents out of town or into submission, we will do what is best for our child. Fortunately, my son's teacher this year is great! This year he is being treated fairly in the classroom, and is bloeeoming. This teacher took a special liking to our son, and is fostering his skills and talents. As a parent we can not ask for more. Sadly, because this teacher has chosen to like us and son and people, and likes our kid, she has had to endure a great deal of flak from certain collegues, as well as other PTA parents who's child is in my son's class. A teacher should not have to feel that she has "to stand her ground" in order to treat of son fairly. My wife and I are now feeling that we not only have to protect our child while on that campus, but his teacher as well. As we have come to find out, other parents have similar concerns, but these PTA teachers and parents went out of their to make our experience a very public one. Thus, we can not blame other parents for not speaking up after they hear what we went through. Ironically, I understand the value of the PTA, and the positive effect it can have in a school. How does one "clean PTA house" in order to break up the cliche. We found out the hard way that even being PTA president doesn't empower one to breakup a self-selected/elected PTA executive commitee?
20 years 8 months ago #64828 by TheMetzyMom
Replied by TheMetzyMom on topic RE: Parent vs. PTA Cliche
These are just ideas, in no particular order as I'm sure each person has different priorities.

1. Civil Court
2. Change Schools
3. Home School
4. Get another parent group started
5. Get more involved in the current group just to spite them... or to change things slowly over time. Kill 'em with kindness you could say...
6. Get a mediator to the school

Just some ideas. Me? I'd probably use #2 first because I wouldn't want my children dissed. I'd definately look at #1, and definately speak with an attorney. I have always believed that a child must leave elementary school as a happy camper as it sets the tone for Jr. High and High School. If school is a bad experience early on, you may never get them to reach their potential. I speak from experience on this.

Good Luck and please keep us posted!
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