She has told me on more than one occasion she is putting the "T" back in our PTO, b/c the staff were previously minimally involved if at all. But instead of having teachers work with us, she has taken control of such things as planning events, and now, it seems, planning fundraisers- even though she told us that it was something that we could do.

We have asked her a few times about how she would like our help, and she has told me that all events will only be planned by the school. We talked at the end of last year when things went haywire, and again in early August.

I think our principal understands our group but doesn't like that we had as much freedom as we did (everything we did was planned and approved by/with the principal at the time) as I think she likes to be in control. Her controlling maneuvers of the last couple months of school made it very hard on our group and several have left, and those of us remaining were on the fence of leaving too, but we are trying to move on and work with the principal not against her.

Last year our Principal (who was new in september) decided in May to stop allowing the PTO to plan and hold any events. Since before I started on the PTO back in 2009, the group had been planning events like the fall festival, spring dance, and field day. So it wasn't out of the ordinary to be planning these events of which the principal ALWAYS had a hand in planning with us.

Well in May she got mad at us for a rumor that was started by a teacher, that was completely untrue (that we said negative things about staff being "lazy") at a meeting where there wasn't staff present, and our conversation was overheard by a nearby teacher. Instead of being rational and talking to us about it, she CANCELLED our teacher appreciation plans of a luncheon (which we previously voted and approved to spend $250, to which she emailed me 30 minutes prior to our may meeting DURING teacher appreciation week that the bill was now $600!) we felt cornered and bullied into approving this item as we had no back up plan and it was scheduled to happen in 3 days. We had a hard discussion about our options and in the end voted to approve the new bill. That conversation was followed by discussion of our playground where there were some comments made that maybe this teacher who was eavesdropping thought that we made comments about teachers? I don't know, and to this day I don't have any clue as to the exact claim of thing we said. The Principal wouldn't tell us. I sent a very thoughtful apology to the staff about the confusion, and while most of us are still bitter and upset, we have moved on.

Long story short, now the PTO isn't allowed to plan any event, except the bookfair. We are allowed to fundraise, and financially support the school in events the school holds. The needs of the group are shifting, and we accept that. Whatever.

In august we held a planning meeting, where I asked flat out if the PTO is allowed to have PTO planned events, and instead of saying 'No', she danced around the bush and said that because when I invited her to our meeting last summer I said "that teachers/the school didn't plan events, we do and we don't know why, but it's the way it's been" (which i did say, because it's true) so her response to getting teachers involved/to show up to events is to take away all our PTO sponsored events and make teachers to that instead.

This really upset our group. I understand when the group's needs/goals need to chance but she was just so mean about it, and did it clearly as punishment to us back in May by pulling our teacher appreciation luncheon, and by cancelling our dance which was planned and approved by her to happen in less than 2 weeks later by claiming that she couldn't get any staff to commit to being there, when some staff told me they were never asked.

After our meeting last week we talked fundraisers, and she followed up with a different company and has now booked a different fundraising thing, I think instead of what we agreed on at the meeting! She keeps flip flopping on us about other things as well.

This has become increasingly frustrating, and I'm just hoping to make it through the year with all my hair intact. Earlier this summer I put in my notice that I would like this to be my laster year running the group, partly so I can be more active at the other parent group I'm on for my older son, and more partly so because I don't think she likes me and I have a hard time working with someone who is trying so hard to make my job more difficult...

any ideas on how to reign her in, or keep her in check. anyone else in the same boat?