Message Boards

×

Notice

The forum is in read only mode.
×
Looking for advice? Join us on Facebook

Get advice, ideas, and support from other parent group leaders just like you—join our closed Facebook group for PTO and PTA Leaders & Volunteers .

Is it inappropriate to talk amongst parents only?

16 years 8 months ago #140788 by pzettler
mamadove,

Is public shool an option? Maybe a vist to a close public school will help you understand if they have a parent group in which you can be involved.

Recently for the first time, a neighbor moved their children to public school, even though this would be the first time for her eldest, who would have her final year in middle school. Before, she or her husband, were driving them 10 miles, one way, twice a day.

She was pleasantly surprised that her children could learn more at the public school.

The school had just barely missed a passing grade on the state's certification test, an improvement in the score from a previous year.

The point is, "they are open about the need to improve, and are improving".

At the previous private school, it was the students fault if they didn't learn. At the new public school it is both the students fault, the parents fault and the schools fault.

Not everyone will have the experience. It may be quite the opposite.
My sister was an assistant principal at a private school in another state. She recently returned to only teaching. She was "the leader" in seeing that school through to redundant independent certification. I have no doubt that the students in that private school get a quality education.
16 years 8 months ago #140782 by MamaDove
Thank you very much, your input has helped me see a bit more clearly. I understand how I could come across as simply trying to stir things up. Let me put things back into context: this is a fairly new private school (started about 5-6 years ago I believe), based on the Montessori approach. I say "based" when in fact it is accredited but because it is new and financially doing fine but not great, in reality things are not always as they are made to appear when parents are first introduced to the school. In my first email I explained that my first-born is in her first year of Elementary. I did not mention that this is the first year this Elementary class has come to be. There are only 9 kids in the classroom, after almost 2 years of build-up and intense suspense, registration has been incredibly low. Without boring you with too many personal details, I have to say we hesitated until the very last month of summer to sign-up. New classroom, inexperienced teacher, hearing from other parents how their child barely learned the basics with her in kindergarten (as she used to teach preschool/kindergarten before) etc...but we still chose this establishment for lack of...anything better at a reasonable distance from my husband's workplace. The greatest shame in this all is the lack of ANY form of associative circle for parents, or parents and teachers. I will even say that any type of association is actually discouraged by the Head of School and Board Members. A true "Teletubbies Land". Even before my worries materialized in the form of my daughter having a hard time in things she has learned last year in kindergarten, I had contacted parents various times to try and get together informally, with much difficulty in getting anyone to arrange their schedules. I guess the mentality around here is "there is no point in "strirring things up" since there is no other Montessori school 40 miles from this little city, we pay through our noses already, so unless changing schools, what's there to do?". I did take a risk putting my child there. I truly believe all parents should keep a close watch on what the direction is going to be for "our" classroom; my husband and I are starting to see things that worry us and I just know other parents will see them too, sooner or later. See, this system, which I'm in love with in theory, has the little problem -for parents-of not rating, testing, comparing etc...so all you hear from teachers and Head of School is that everything's always OK and that the great "blossoming child" will appear in the 3rd, and last, year of each Montessori cycle. Please remember this school has always had a hard time getting enough students/money, and, I think, cultivates the Art of keeping a culture of ignorance, division, and submissiveness amongst parents who are just able to keep up with tuition and the fatter cats such as the above named Board member who after labeling my initiative "inappropriate", suggested we all simply meet at her home for a luncheon in...April (my kid has produced 8 lines in writing in 2 months!). I know exactly how it will go, between the fake niceties and empty dialogues...not at all the idea I have of intelligent adult professionals trying to contribute to a progressive education alternative in this "culturally quiet" town! Teletubbies Land I tell you....
16 years 8 months ago #140754 by pals
I do have to agree with Tim, when I first read this I was picturing a witch hunt complete with torches and axes. I guess maybe some of my own school history years ago left me with this feeling.

I applaud that you want to get parents together but it sounds like you have your own personal agenda which is great but if you are trying to build a relationship with the school the avenue you are taking might be wrong and send the message that you are a trouble maker parent and that you are bonding together with other parents.

I am wondering if your school has a shared decision making team that discussion like this would be better at, it could actually help to make the changes you are looking for, talking amongst yourself without any true school input looks like you are trying to stir things up.

If I was use I would check into what teams you can join at your school that parents can openly discuss their feelings. I am not saying you dont have the right to talk, I just worry about the way you are going about it.

"When you stop learning you stop growing."
16 years 8 months ago #140739 by Rockne
Let me look at it from a different angle.

First -- granted, you have every right to discuss school issues with anyone you like.

But the question is what's the best way to discuss? And I think there's a series of steps/conversations (almost an escalation system) that are best followed for everyone's best interest.

I'm glad you spoke with the teacher first. That's always a great first step, because -- quite often -- what gets communicated from kids to home or assumptions by parents about what's happening in classroom are not correct.

So I assume your discussion with the teacher didn't result in the answers or changes you desired, right?

To me, there's 1) the chance that the teacher is right; 2) the chance that teacher is wrong to a degree but making a mountain out of mistake or one policy you don't like could be off; and 3) a next step required (provided you want to escalate) before going this "parents gather surreptitiously" route. And that next step is talking to the principal or arranging a meeting with the principal and the teacher.

What's your goal in gathering all the parents together first?

Like I said, you have every right to talk with whomever you like. But what you have the right to do and what is right thing to do can be different. Maybe that's what the School Boarder was thinking in his or her response.

Tim

PTO Today Founder
16 years 8 months ago #140700 by beignets
i agree with shawn, you can and should talk abnout anything you want amogngst yourselves.
i wouldnt vote for that board member come reelection. sounds like htey are very iinsecure for one.
16 years 8 months ago #140686 by Shawn
You might not be able to use school (ie school email, backpack flyers) info and resources to form informal classroom parent groups

This lunkhead obviously doesnt understand 'Freedom of Speech', Assembly, etc.

If any of my childrens classmates parents wanted to start a classroom discussion at thier house (or anywhere other than school) and used the contacts they've acquired to invite them, no teacher, administrator or anyone not invited need be invited or informed.

Total hogwash and ludicrous - parents can meet and discuss outside of school anything they want, wish or desire.

<font size=""1""><font color="#"black"">Liberalism is not an affilation its a curable disease. </font></font><br /><br><font color="#"gray"">~Wisdom of Shawnshuefus</font><br /><br><font color="#"blue""><font size=""1"">The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is...
Time to create page: 0.057 seconds
Powered by Kunena Forum
^ Top