Hi Jen,
I'd like to share some comments that our publisher, Tim Sullivan, shared with a PTO leader a while back who was in a similar situation. I think you'll find his comments helpful:
Regarding a very disruptive parent, Tim said, "In these situations, you really need to bring in the Principal and/or Super and have them take over handling this person. They get paid for that kind of thing. As a parent volunteer, you don’t really have the authority to ban someone from a building or from school meetings. But school administrators do. They are paid (and hopefully trained) to deal with difficult parents in a school setting. You aren’t.
Provided everyone agrees that 1) this person has been give fair treatment; and 2) is being unreasonable and causing harm – then he needs to be told by people with the authority to tell him that the behavior needs to stop. And what will happen if it doesn’t stop. Parents have been banned from school buildings before. If a parent is deemed unsafe or that parent is interfering with the good work of the whole, then that may be the only alternative. It would likely be ugly, but it needs to be dealt with. Otherwise, as you are already seeing, your whole parent group (and all the great contributions you are making) will rather quickly disappear."
So, give this a try, Jen. I hope it helps to know there are other groups that have gone through similar difficulties. Stay in touch, please, and best of luck,
I've heard that rigorous application of Robert's Rules of Order can help in these situations. You make it clear that you're applying the same rules to everyone, not singling him out, and he has to follow the rules to be allowed to speak.
We have a crazy, control freak of a dad who has made our PTO board miserable. He is incredibly disrespectful during meetings, he talks out of line and out of turn, and he yells and shouts. The entire board is at a point where it is him or us, we are ready to walk out. We had our first meeting of the year last night. We had a GREAT turn out! 60 plus parents showed... by the end of the meeting there were maybe 10. Everyone just started getting up and leaving. We got nothing accomplished and I know 80% of the parents that were there last night, will not come back. We had this same issue with him last year (our last meeting of the year had maybe 7 people - most of which were board members). He chases and scares people away and no one wants to come to meetings just to hear him shout. We are at a total loss and just want him gone. We are afraid, though, that if we do "ban" him from coming to meetings, he will come back and sue us. He is that kind of person. It's obnoxious beyond all belief and we need action fast before we have no one left! Thanks in advance for any advice!
