I haven't ever seen any IRS documents specifying how votes have to be taken. If you have previous by-laws, then you'd need to comply with them when amending. If you're completely new, then I don't think there are any such requirements.
We want to incorporate our PTO and file for 501(c)(3) status. We are going to have a meeting to vote on the by-laws and charter and it is my understanding that members must be there to formally vote - proxy votes cannot be accepted. Is this what the IRS requires? I know we have to submit the documents and the minutes stating the documents were accepted as part of our filing. Thank you!