PTO Poppa - I had to spend some time this weekend thinking about your dilema.
Often on this board the question of switching from PTA to PTO comes up and the advice given is pretty consistent: (paraphasing)
Educate the community, let them vote and follow the majority rule.
It looks like that is what's been done. Your group has tried both systems. Based on those experiences the majority has decided that PTA is the way for them to go.
I believe that if such a major decision is to be made, it should be presented to the entire parent and staff population and not just to the current members. Maybe there are parents out there who would join if only it were a PTA. They should have a voice.
If it seems that it was a fair, educated, open process and the ulitmate decision was to switch, I would try my best to support the group. I would be curious to know if all of the folks who voted in favor of PTA actually come out to join and support the group as well!
I have the same issue you do with having to pay to be involved in a parent group and then having those funds go off to support programs I might not personally agree with. For those reasons, I probably wouldn't belong to a PTA group. I
would find some of the many other ways to get involved at the school and still be part of my child's education.