You are right I am just very frustrated. I think the group is basically gonna do whatever he wants and walk at the end of our term. He basically came in to the meeting with the Superintendent today and said that his PTC core group was negative and undermining his authority. That he heard that we were bad mouthing him and the school from parents, teachers, staff and administrations. Boy aren't we getting around. I work part-time and basically avoid everybody at the school so that no says anything about me. But apparently that doesn't work. I asked him who it was coming from and he couldn't give names and then I told him shame on you for listening to gossip instead of confirming it. Then he said we were always at the school so he did not think it was inappropriate to call us in for a meeting at his convience. I told him no because I haven't done anything but drop my children off and pick them up that is it. On thursdays my husband does it and I don't go near the school because I want a rest from being asked by him about what he wants for the school. Basically I am avoiding him because when he comes towards me I know it is one of two things; he wants money or a someone has lodged a complaint. So I don't want to deal with that on a daily basis. Then when I asked him not to call my home and leave rude messages demanding that we meet and he doesn't appreciate my pettiness or he calls at nine o'clock at night to tell me he was glad that I gave him a copy of the by-laws because he didn't know he had so much power and then hangs up on me he said "Well how else am I supposed to get a hold of you". My response was "You just said we are at the school all the time". So I don't think he liked that. I just want to get through the year and quit worring about being bullied. I origanlly got involved for the kids and now its I have to do what he wants or he bullies, demands, pesters and calls my home. I have been started getting sick over all of this and I don't think it's going to change unless he realizes without parent help to raise those funds he has no money to ask for. I thank you and I will probably come back from time to time because I still plan on volunteering for my older son but never again at this level.

Yvonne

I have to agree with the above post that it is the people that make the organization and not the name. I am a PTA president and am very satisfied with how our group is working but it is because of the firm foundation that was set years ago and by the good relationship we have with our Principal.

Our officers and the Principal (our executive board) meet a week before our general meeting generally to set the agenda but also to hear about any concerns that the teachers or the parents have. We also look over the budget at the beginning of the school year and as an executive board come to a consensus on everything in it. Then we present it to the membership. They are free to change anything and then we vote on it at the following meeting. So, for example if she felt that we were using the copiers excessively and wanted us to chip in more for it, we would put the amount she suggested in the budget, and then have it discussed at the general meeting - along with the rest of the budget and then vote on it. I feel that we have a real partnership with the Principal, and that makes all of us feel welcome and appreciated. I guess what I'm getting at is that I feel a good relationship with your Principal is much more important then changing your Parent group name. good luck!

PTC AND PTO - same concept. The people make the group, not the other way around. PTA will not be able to solve the problems you are having with your principal. If all you say is true, then this principal is on a serious power trip. Your group is organized by its bylaws alone. Your bylaws should have a statement as to how they can be changed, and I am skeptical that it would say "if the principal says so, it is the law!" More than likely it requires general membership approval. You should not feel like you have to tiptoe around the principal, nor be at his beck and call. You are volunteers there to serve the student population of the school, and if he is treating you and the other volunteers as you have painted the picture, he will be standing alone and soon, not to mention the problem that future groups trying to start such a worthwhile organization in your school will run up against.

Here's a thought - perhaps if you post one specific question at a time on this board that has been a problem - be brief and concise, and then when you have a few answers, print them out and go to him with it. Say, "Hey, Mr. Principal - looks like perhaps we are not the only ones who have come up against ____________ and here are some suggestions for how to resolve the situation." I may be naive, but I still think killing with kindness and compromise are worth one last try.

If all else fails - start another group with a similar purpose, call it anything other than XYZ School PTC so that the two cannot be confused and start from scratch. I hate to see that happen, but from the frustration level in your posts it may be the only way.

Thank you both but I am the PTC pres and we are at a small war with the principal. He tells us where we are to spend the money that we have raised, we've been told we can not use any equipment at the school to make copies or fliers, it was even suggested that the teachers union was against us. That aside we are a small school of less than four hundred students and when we are busy we can not just show up and met with the principal because he wants it. It is getting old and alot of my parents think we should disban. I don't want him to ruin it for the children and teachers who benefit from our fundraisers and help. So we go to OfficeMaxx to make the copies and now he want us to draw up an extensive budget so that he can approve of it without it going before the general membership. When I went through the by-laws and found that he was only an advisor I told him he could not do this and he says we are being petty and undermining his authority. He would like to understand and meet with us immediately. When we tried bringing up trying to amend one of our by-laws so that the teachers could come before us at our general meeting he called me at home at almost 9pm to state he was glad that we pointed out that he had so much power and that no we could not amend that by-law. I recited articles and section of our by-laws in a response letter with a general budget and stating that according to the by-laws it needed to be approved by the general meeting and he again called my home and this time left a message stating we need to met tomorrow as per his request and to discuss our pettiness and he did not appreciate the tone of the letter. I am at my wits end we talked to the Superintendent of the school and then I come home to this. We are now getting to were we are trying to aviod him and we are worried he is going to take it out on our children. I need those answers so that we could figure out if what he is doing to us is legal. He approaches us while we are dropping off or picking up our children to state these complaints. I am trying to figure out how to save my group and stop him from harrassing us in a legal way. I'm sorry this is so long but I am at my wits end and am tired of being bullied. I even told him that according to our by-laws he is nothing more than an advisor and he has to go through the general meeting like everyone else. Am I wrong. We have bent over backwards trying to please him and to stay out of him and the teachers way. Yet he still keeps making demands. I will look into all these things but I need answers quick because my parents want to join a PTA because then they will have backing to these problems instead of us against him.

Nat

Tim's too nice to say this, but I will - you're considering PTA WHY? So you can pay dues to a national and state level? That, should you change your mind in the future will chastise you and berate you and browbeat you and tell you that you cannot change your mind?

O.K. - maybe that's an oversimplification and before anyone gets upset with me, PTA has done much good for the world. I am a product of schools with PTA's - but my personal opinion is PTO all the way.

Keep reading through posts on this site and ask as many questions as you need to. We'll walk you through this. If you don't have any bylaws to be found anywhere, get a group of concerned parents like yourself together and start from ground zero.

Good luck!