I agree that State Leadership Conferences are valuable. My PTA has it in their budget as a line item. It is also in our standing rules as to who has first refusal to go.
When our budget is passed- it is outlined (in detail) to the general membership (what the conference is, how many will go- why it is valuable for us to go). Nobody has ever objected to our sending 2 people to the conference. (a cost of about 400.00- including travel).
Everybody learns valuable things (at conference) we then bring back to the school (last year it was an innovative reading program parents can do at home). Also it gives valuable training to new members of the board. It is in everybody's interest that our officers be well trained and motivated. It is also a valuable Bonding and learning time with other PTAs around the state. You get LOTS of ideas from what other people are doing, what their problems are, and how to solve them (kind of like this forum- but live).
Many people from our county go to the cconference and we save money on travel by carpooling.
We do offer a per diem to each person attending (10.00 for each meal excluding the meals that are already a part of the conference - a luncheon and a county hospitality dinner.). For out first day- (a travel day-) it is 20.00 because everybody should eat breakfast at home- the next day it is 30.00,(3 meals) the the 3rd day it is 10.00 because a luncheon and a dinner are paid for- and the last day is 20.00- breakfast and lunch only- home in time for dinner). Total- $80.00 per diem.
As a treasurer- I have sometimes asked people to forego their per diem (if money is tight- and usually everybody is happy to do it).
We always share rooms with other PTAs attending- also to save money.
I applaud you for wanting to bring this up to your board. it should be outlined in the rules- what your PTA will and will not pay for. It should also be clear, that anybody attending is expected to bring back information and be prepared to present it to your board and your general membership (that way- it is clear it is not play time- though I am sure you all enjoy the experience.).
The member of the board (spending all the money on food) should be made aware of your concerns, and really should not mind your bringing this up.
Hopefully you will get it strightened out, before your budget is finalized.