Yes but its not our job to judge

Only to present the facts, tell them our values and say I dont agree with her choices.

Someone can be respected (i.e My 1st Sgt was an outright @#$ but respected his rank because he was the man in charge of day to day oprations)

He drank to much (off duty) and made some bad (choices in life) but they never interfered with getting our job or mission done, I would trust him completely during combat (and did) but his offduty choices were his (that didnt make him less of a 1st Sgt just human)

[ 10-25-2006, 09:36 PM: Message edited by: Shawn ]

My 2 cents:

Respect: (1) To feel or show diferential regard for; esteem (2) To avoid violation or interference with.

I can respect her as a teacher and an authority figure (1), but my respect for her life choices are by (2).

Those are polar by any means. I think this is becoming a more common situation where parents are frustrated. At one time sending your child to school meant the teacher was going to teach the 3 R's. Today, they are teaching values.

Values became a part of the curriculum when it became an issue "the powers that be" believed it wasn't being taught at home. While at the same time, parents who do teach morals/values are frustrated that it doesn't parallel theirs.


For those of you who said she isn't an open book for judgment: I don't think mom43's post was about judging the teacher. I read it as a mom who is trying to figure out how to keep this teacher the respect she deserves as a teacher and keep her (mom's) own respect with values and beliefs for her daughter.

Most of us think of the respect with its first definition: esteeem, regard for. It's pretty hard to say I respect your choice when you are totally against that type of choice.

I just wanted to add that what this teacher does in her personal life is her business. I would also add WHY she's now pregnant is also her business - be it a choice or a circumstance.
If she is doing her job, doing it well, not bring her "reasons" into the classroom - then there is where it ends. Don't get me wrong - teach your child what you belive - but don't condem someone for a choice they make.

I agree, and will add, that ther are some single-by-choice (and no doubt others too) parents out there doing a heck of a better job at raising their kid/s (and teacheing them values) than some 2 parent families who are in a traditional mariage.

Originally posted by ademom74:
Yes, I agree with tolerance and choice and free will and personal freedoms and all those ideals should be respected but realistically, this person IS a role model. Just not one you want your kids to emulate.

Realistically-this is not uncommon. People have children w/out being married all the time. Some people are in committed relationships and see no need for marriage, some people ARE irresponsible, some are responsible, but have made bad decisions &/or have found themselves in a suprising situation, & some just want to have a child. Her personal life has nothing to do w/whether or not her students should respect her. Yes, she is a role model, but that does not mean that every aspect of her life is open for judgement. There is no "but" in "tolerance and choice and free will and personal freedoms and all those ideals".

If the same teacher were a man haveing a child out of wedlock, the students would be totally oblivious to the entire matter......

Life is not fair, that much is sure.

Anwyay, you will hvae teachers all your kids learning life long , that will impart some value or other you dont agree with (like, what do you do with a teacher that has visible tatoos you dont want your child to think is 'cool', and come home and say, daddy, I want a tatoo too like Mrs xyz!!?? and on and on and on).

Its why kids have parents, to share and teach their own values to, all the while teahcing our kids tolerance and the value of respecting every individuals right to free choice, as long as it doesnt infringe on our own and as long as it doesnt break any laws.